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Run!
快跑
Morty, do it!
Morty 动手
Hit the button now!
快摁按钮
I can't do it, Rick!
我做不到 Rick
They're my parents and sister!
这可是我的爸妈和姐姐啊
Morty, I already told you it's not your family!
Morty 我已经和你说过了 这不是你家人
They're clones from an alternate reality,
是另一个未来的平行宇宙里
possessed by demonic alien spirits from another dimension's future!
被外星恶灵附身的他们
Do you need a mnemonic device or something?
你是得要什么记忆辅助装置之类的吗
Just hit the button, already!
快摁按钮
Morty, please, I love you, sweetheart.
不要 Morty 我爱你 亲爱的
Oh!
噢
Good work, Morty.
干得好 Morty
You know, th-th-these demonic alien spirits are really valuable.
这这这些外星恶灵可是非常珍贵的
You okay, Morty?
你还好吗 Morty
I told you not to trust that tuna.
我跟你说了那些金枪鱼不能吃了
I just killed my family!
我不管他们究竟是什么
I don't care what they were.
我刚杀了我的家人
I don't know, Morty.
是吗 Morty
Some people'd pay top dollar for that kind of breakthrough.
有的人出大价钱就为了迈出这一步呢
You know what, Rick? That's it!
Rick 我受够了
I'm done with these insane adventures!
我受够这些疯狂的冒险了
That was really traumatizing!
我的心灵受到了创伤
I quit! I'm out!
我不干了
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
哇 哇 哇
Come on, Morty, don't don't don't be like that.
别啊 Morty 别别别这样
The universe is a crazy, chaotic place.
宇宙就是这样疯狂而混乱的啊
You're the one that's crazy and chaotic!
你才疯狂又混乱
Adventures are supposed to be simple and fun.
冒险应该是轻松愉快才对
Oh, yeah, Morty, yeah.
是啊 Morty 是啊
Yeah, that that that's real easy to say from the sidekick position.
这这这这种话 跟班的说起来当然轻松
But but, uh, how about next time you be in charge,
那那不然下次 你来负责
完整版请点击
and then we'll talk about how simple and fun it is?
我们看看是怎么个轻松愉快法
Seriously, Rick?
真的吗 Rick
Y-y-you'll you'll let me call the shots?
你让我来做决定吗
Okay, yeah, fine.
是的
But let's make it interesting, Morty.
不过为了更有意思些 Morty
I-I-I-if your adventure sucks and we bail halfway through it,
如如如果你的冒险很烂 我们半路放弃了
you lose the right to bitch about all future adventures.
那以后的冒险你都不准抱怨
Plus, you have to do my laundry for a month.
还有 你得帮我洗一个月的衣服
Okay, all right, tough guy!
没问题 硬汉
But if my adventure's good,
但如果成功的话
I get to be in charge of every third adventure!
以后每三个冒险就由我做主
Every tenth.
每十个
Deal. All right.
成交
W-well, come on, let's get going.
那那我们快点出发吧
Dad, the dishwasher's doing that thing again.
爸 洗碗机老毛病又犯了
Washing dishes?
洗碗的毛病么
- No. The opposite. Can you fix it? - Grandpa Rick,
- 它不洗啊 你能修好它么- Rick外公
Can you help me with my science homework?
我作业不会做 能帮帮我吗
Yeah j-just don't do it.
可以啊 别做就好啦
Grandpa!
外公
Hey, Rick, you got some kind of hand-shaped device
Rick 你有什么手状的发明
that can open this mayonnaise jar?
能帮我打开这美乃滋的罐子嘛
Wow. Hat trick.
哇 帽子戏法(三连击)
All right, Morty, let's put a pin in this.
好吧 Morty 冒险的事情先暂且放一下吧
I got to help your pathetic family.
你家这群可怜虫需要我的帮助
Oh, that sounds like something a chicken would say.
说这种话 你不是怂(鸡)了吧
Bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk.
咯咯咯 咯咯咯
Oh, Morty, you done did it this time. It's on.
呵呵 Morty 你真是欺人太甚了 赌约正式开始
I can't wait to watch your adventure lay a huge fart.
我真是等不及你的冒险不终而散
As for you dingdongs...
至于你们这群渣渣
This is a Meeseeks Box.
这是一个使命必达盒
Let me show you how it works. You press this.
我来示范一下 你按这个
I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me!
看过来 我是使命必达先生
You make a request.
你说出你的请求
Mr. Meeseeks, open Jerry's stupid mayonnaise jar.
使命必达先生 打开Jerry的傻逼美乃滋罐子
Yes, siree!
遵命 先生
The Meeseeks fulfills the request.
使命必达先生会满足你的请求
All done!
搞定
Wow!
哇
And then it stops existing.
然后他会自动消失
Oh, my god, he exploded!
天哪 他自爆了
Trust me, they're fine with it.
没事 他们巴不得这样
Knock yourselves out, just keep your requests simple.
请便 但记得请求不要太复杂
They're not gods.
他们可不是上帝
All right! G-get out of here now! Everybody out of here!
行 好了 快点出去吧 大家快滚出去
I got a bet to win!
我还有场赌要赢呢
So many possibilities.
好多心愿想实现啊
My mind is racing.
脑中一片翻腾
If we're gonna use this thing,
如果我们要用这东西的话
which I'm not even sure we should, we need to keep it simp...
虽然我觉得还是有点玄 我们的请求得简...
I'm Mr. Meeseeks!
我是使命必达先生
I want to be popular at school!
我想在学校里变得受欢迎
Ooh, okay!
行啊
Summer, what did I just...
Summer 我刚刚还在说来着
Ooh, I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me!
我是使命必达先生 看过来
I-I-I want I want to be a more complete woman!
我想成为一个更加完整的女人
Beth Beth!
Oh, yeah! Yes, ma'am!
嗯 行啊 女士
You guys are doing it wrong.
你们这是在乱用吧
He said "simple."
他说了要"简单"
Hey, there. I'm Mr. Meeseeks!
你好 我是使命必达先生
Mr. Meeseeks, I would like to take two strokes off my golf game.
使命必达先生 我希望我的高尔夫成绩能减两杆
Ooh, yeah! Can do!
行啊 没问题
Nailed it.
搞定
God, Morty, what a boring start to an adventure.
天哪 Morty 这冒险开始得好无聊啊
I don't w-w-w-why didn't we just go to Kentucky?
我们干嘛不直接去肯塔基州啊
Rick, this is a fantasy-type world with creatures and all sorts of fantasy things.
Rick 这是一个奇幻世界 里面充满了神奇的生物和奇幻的东西
- W-we're going on a quest, okay? - Can't wait.
- 我们是来探险的- 好期待啊
Ahem. Excuse me!
咳咳 不好意思
We are two humble heroes in search of adventure!
我们是两位渴望冒险的谦逊英雄
Oh, my god, so embarrassing.
天哪 太丢脸了
At last! Two heroes! You must help us!
你们总算来了 两位英雄 你们得帮帮我们
完整版请点击
This village is terribly poor,
这个村太穷了
yet the giant that lives in the clouds above
但是住在云端的巨人
has untold treasures!
却私藏了数不清的财富
You know what?
这样啊
I-I-I accept your call to adventure, good sir, kind sir.
我接受你的请求 这位善良又温和的先生
Come on, Rick. There's a giant in the clouds!
走吧 Rick 云端上住着巨人呢
Yeah. Beginner's luck.
呵呵 新手的运气
In conclusion, a friendship with Summer Smith is the most valuable
总而言之 与Summer Smith的友谊是可贵的
and enriching experience of your young lives.
能让你们年轻的生命更加充实
I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me!
我是使命必达先生 看过来
Thank you!
谢谢
Uh, Mr. Meeseeks, was it?
使命必达先生是吗
Yeah. Gene Vagina.
我是基恩 阴道
Listen, I'm in a bit of custody thing with my ex and was wondering...
我最近因为监护权和前妻有点问题 我想能不能
No, I'll g-get your info from Summer.
没事 我找Summer要你的联系方式好了
I got pregnant at 17.
我17岁时就怀孕了
I mean, I still put myself through veterinary school.
我还是上完了兽医学院
Yes, I'm successful, but what if I hadn't...
我很成功 但要是当时我没能
I'm just saying, somewhere along the way,
我只是想说 时过境迁
I lost that wide-eyed girl from Muskegon.
那个天真烂漫的马斯基根少女已经不复存在了
She's still there, Beth.
她还在你心里啊 Beth
Well, her waistline isn't.
至少腰是没了
Beth, having a family
Beth 即使有了家庭
doesn't mean that you stop being an individual.
你也还是可以拥有属于自己的一片天啊
You know the best thing you can do for people that depend on you?
对爱你 依赖你的人
Be honest with them, even if it means setting them free.
你更应该坦诚 即使这意味着放手
You're saying I should leave Jerry.
你的意思是说 我应该离开Jerry
I can't believe I'm finally having this conversation.
真不敢相信 终于有人谈到了我的心声
More wine?
还要酒吗
I think I've had enough.
不用 我喝得够多了
Remember to square your shoulders, Jerry.
肩放松 自然往后收 Jerry
Yeah, yeah. I got it.
是啊 是啊 我知道了
That's okay. I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me!
没事的啦 看过来 我是使命必达先生
Try again and keep your head down.
再来一次 头压低一点
Okay, well, which is it?
所以到底要干嘛
Square my shoulders or keep my head down?
收肩还是头压低一点
Well, it's both. But most importantly, you got to relax.
两个都要 但是最重要的是 你得放轻松
You know what, Mr. Meeseeks?
使命必达先生
I don't think this is working. I give up.
我觉得这样没用 我放弃了
I'm sorry, Jerry, but it doesn't work like that.
对不起 Jerry 你不能放弃
I'm Mr. Meeseeks.
我是使命必达先生
I have to fulfill my purpose so I can go away. Look at me.
我必须满足你的请求然后消失 看过来
Well, make yourself comfortable, because I suck.
那你随意吧 我逊爆了
No, Jerry, I'm the one who sucks!
不 我才逊爆了
Let me try something.
我试试这个办法
I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me!
我是使命必达先生 看过来
- Hi, Mr. Meeseeks! I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me. - Hi!
- 嗨 使命必达先生 我是使命必达先生 看过来- 嗨
Can you help me get two strokes off of Jerry's golf swing?
你能帮我让Jerry的高尔夫成绩少两杆嘛
Can do! I'm Mr. Meeseeks!
当然可以 我是使命必达先生
Is he keeping his shoulders squared?
他的肩有往后收嘛
Ooh, he's trying!
他有在努力
All right, Morty.
好了 Mort
W-w-we're in your stupid giant's castle.
我们到了这蠢巨人的城堡里面了
W-what do we do next?
接下来做什么
Would you just relax, Rick?
放轻松行吗 Rick
All we got to do is find the treasure room, okay?
我们只要找到宝藏室就行了
It's nice and simple.
简单明了
You know, I-I-I'm sorry everything's going so smoothly and adventurously.
冒险这么这么一帆风顺真是对不起啊
Uh-oh, Morty.
不好了 Morty
Startin' to get a little hairy.
事情不太妙了啊
What do you want to do, boss?
老大 我们接下来该怎么做
Come on, hurry. Behind this cookie jar.
快点 躲到这个饼干罐后面
Fee! Fi! Fo! Fum!
(杰克与豌豆中巨人所念四行诗的第一句)
Just give up, Morty. This is game over.
放弃吧 Morty 游戏到此为止
I'll take us home right now. You just say the word.
只要你开口 我们现在就能回去
No way, Rick. This is all part of it.
没戏 Rick 这都是冒险的一部分
Adventures have conflict. Deal with it.
冒险就是要有冲突 要勇敢直面
I smell the blood of...(an English man)
我闻到了...(第二句 我闻到了英国人的血味)
- Holy crap. - Oh, boy.
- 我操- 天哪
He looks pretty bad down there, Morty.
他看起来快不行了 Morty
Looks like he's bleeding out.
要失血而亡了
Oh, Jesus! Dale!
天哪 Dale
- You sons of bitches! - Oh, man.
- 你们这群混蛋- 不好
Hello, 911?
911吗
My husband has been attacked by tiny people!
我老公被迷你人袭击了
He's dying!
已经奄奄一息了
Hey, look, we get it.
听着 我们懂
You're little, you're down on your luck, you think,
你们很小 最近又不太景气 然后你们就想
"Hey, he's a giant.
"反正他是个巨人
Why don't we break into his home, rob him, and murder him?"
不妨我们潜入他家 先抢劫再杀人灭口 多好啊"
But that's not how it went down!
事情的经过不是这样子的
Oh, well, it's going down like that.
没差 反正事情就这么入案了
You're both going down like that.
你们两个就这么入狱吧
Ooh, boy, Morty, you're really showing me how it's done.
哇 Morty 你真是让我见识到了怎么冒险啊
Real straightforward and fun.
真是简单又有趣
Like, letting go of the need to be popular
放下想要变得受欢迎这个想法
is what makes people like you.
才能更好地让别人喜欢你
The most important love you can receive is from yourself.
真爱来自自爱
Okay, Jerry, you got to just choke up on the club!
Jerry 虎口下握 靠近击球点
Well, which is it, choke up or follow-through?!
到底干嘛 下握还是随球把挥杆动作做完
Aww, come on, Jerry, we've been over this.
Jerry 拜托 我们说了好几次了
You know you got to do both!
两个都要做到
This is as frustrating for us as it is for you.
我们和你一样心烦
Don't tell me that! That just puts pressure on me!
别来和我扯这些 这只会让我压力更大
- Just try to relax. - You try to relax!
- 试着放松啦- 你才该放松
Have you ever tried to relax?! It is a paradox!
你试着放松过吗 真是自相矛盾
These Meeseeks, huh? Kind of a handful.
这些使命必达先生 可真棘手啊
I can't imagine what you two must be going through.
你们肯定也很头疼吧
Our Meeseeks have been gone for hours, Jerry.
Jerry 我们的使命必达先生都已经消失几个小时了
You're kidding me.
你这是在逗我吧
Notice anything different?
注意到什么变化没
I-I-I'm sorry. Hours?
等等 你说几个小时前就消失了?
Dad, mom is a beautiful woman!
爸 看妈妈多美
Look at her! You will lose her!
你这样会失去她的
Uhh...
呃
Hey, Jerry, you mind if we get back to the task at hand?
Jerry 你能回来继续练习了嘛
Meeseeks don't usually have to exist this long.
使命必达先生一般不需要存活这么久的
It's getting weird.
这感觉怪怪的
Order in the court!
法庭内保持肃静
Before the jury reaches its verdict,
在陪审团裁定前
I just want to say that I consider you both very guilty.
我想先澄清 我个人认为你们两个是有罪的
Oh, great adventure, Buddy.
真是奇妙的冒险啊 伙计
Rick and Morty go to giant prison.
Rick和Morty进巨人监狱
You know, if somebody drops the soap,
要是有人不小心掉块肥皂
it's gonna land on our heads and crush our spines, Morty.
砸我们头上 我们的脊柱就直接被砸碎了 Morty
You know, i-i-i-it'll be really easy to rape us after that.
那之后再奸尸多容易
We're gonna be okay, Rick.
我们不会有事的 Rick
How? They took my portal gun.
你想怎么做 他们把我的传送枪没收了
This is an open-and-shut case, Morty.
这案子一目了然 Morty
You know, w-w-w-what do you think's gonna happen,
你觉得还能发生什么事吗
some magical angel's gonna show up and then...
凭空出现一个有魔力的天使 然后...
Fee Fi Fo Fum Fee! Fi! Fo! Fum!
I smell the violation of civil liberties!
我闻到了侵犯公民自由的味道
Your honor, I'm from a tiny-persons advocacy group
法官大人 我来自一个迷你人倡导团体
and I have here in my hand a motion to dismiss.
我来此是为了递交驳回此案的动议
These little men were never read their giant rights
这些迷你人未曾被告知他们的巨人权利
and are therefore free-fi to fo-home.
所以应当被 fi释 fo放
W-what the hell is he talking about?
他到底在说什么啊
They're free to go, is what I meant.
我的意思是他们自由了
I-I-I'm deconstructing our our thing we say.
我我我只是想贴近我们的口头禅而已
We're giants. Nobody got that? Whatever.
我们不是巨人嘛 居然没人懂 算了随便吧
Oh, man, what did I tell you, Rick? We did it!
我就和你说嘛 Rick 我们做到了
All right, Morty, looks Like the portal gun's still working.
Morty 看来传送枪还能用
You ready to head home?
准备回家了吗
Oh, yeah, you'd like that, wouldn't you, Rick?
是啊 这样你就逞心如意了不是嘛 Rick
Well, you know what? We're not bailing out just yet.
我们还不能放弃
You know, we're gonna go find some treasure or something
我们还要去找一些宝藏什么的
and we're gonna bring it to those villagers.
带回去分给那些村民呢
Morty, cut your losses. This is obviously a wash.
Morty 别逞强了 这明显是徒劳无功
Yeah, you were saying that back w-w-w-when we first got arrested,
是啊 我们一开始被捕的时候你也是这么说的
but here we are, you know, walking down the Courthouse steps.
现在我们被释放了 还大步流星的走出法院呢
Oh, boy, Morty.
天哪 Morty
Usually, walking down the Courthouse steps is the easy part of the adventure.
通常从法院的楼梯走下去是冒险里比较简单的部分
What do you say, Morty?
怎么说 Morty
I say give me a hand, Sidekick.
我说 帮把手 跟班
I'm Mr. Meeseeks.
我是使命必达先生
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